Love Letters

So over the summer Chad and I rented the Miranda July film, Me, You and Everyone We Know and it kind of grew on me. Maybe it was the art historian in me that is always willing to embrace the quirk factor or there is something charming about a girl who trying too hard, but I was really pleased to find the web site that she collaborates on. It has daily assignments or challenges kind of like the Fancy Simple girls, except a little more extreme. So if you really want to challenge yourself and pull out of a rut today, give it try. Or just look at what other people have posted. I don't know who the "you" in learning to love you more is supposed to be, but today it can be the person who gets lost when quirky ceased to be appropriate.

Thankless listing

So I am way behind with the Fancy Simple girls who last week made a list of what they were grateful for so here is my abridged twist for the week after.

1) My husband's health-Being able to make my holiday trip without worrying about how he was feeling was a Godsend. Very grateful for his speedy recovery.

2) My Allman Family-Visiting family is usually a big pain in the ass. Let's face it, flying sucks, not sleeping in your own bed sucks, and generally your family involves some sort of dysfunction that is totally obnoxious. That's not just me right? Visiting the Allmans is a little different. I get to hang with my aunt who is one of my favorite friends at her manse, which is awesome because I get to lock myself in her bathroom and just smell the soaps for twenty minutes, and then I get to say things like, "I'm sorry I have to go, we are lunching poolside at the club."

3) Mani/pedies-Though I ruined my perfect 40's pin-up red cleaning up today, a quick polish change this weekend and no one will ever no that I clean my own house at the Christmas part this weekend. Ok, that's a lie, but I can pretend that I don't clean my house.

4) The Detriot Airport play area-God bless the people who realized that if you don't have something that a three year-old can climb on during a three hour layover someone, like a gate agent, might get seriously hurt.

5) Lunch dates-I don't get lunch dates with my hubby often, but today I did and managed to pack a great time into 30 minutes. It is amazing how much more energy you have after you laugh for thirty minutes straight.

Now for the things that I am not thankful for, because you knew all this good cheer had to take a turn for the worse.

1) Fit camp-So the Allman's dysfunction this trip was the fitness craze they are all on. I guess only I consider it dysfunctional to want to be fit, but nevertheless it sucked. I worked out more in three days than i think I did in the past two weeks. Sore, very sore. Fitness instructors are cold, unfeeling people that must not have been loved by their parents. However, we are now down to 171 for those of you who are counting.

2) Crabby men travelling coach-Dude, you are travelling coach from Florida. The ONLY people on this flight are elderly with special needs and small children. Get over yourself.

3) Airport Starbucks-Why for the love of all things sacred would you be on the wrong side of security? I can't take my coffee through security so you just sit there and taunt me from the other side.

4) Work functions-Need I say more? The employees hate going to them and their spouses hate it even more. Employees at least have work to talk about, I have to sit and make the most painful small talk ever with people who don't know or care who I am.

I'll leave it at four so it appears as if I am more grateful than ungrateful. That way I might not go straight to hell for the describing the season of the birth of my Lord as "soul-eating."

Home again, home again

So we are back from sunny Florida where Olivia was spoiled rotten. Here she is at my aunt's gated wonderland carnival. We had a great time, but now we are struggling with that vacation let down of laundry, weeks of housework since i didn't get much done other than the illness sanitation from a few weeks ago and of course the soul-eating beast of Christmas.
Yes, I am grinchy when it comes to Christmas. There are many things I love about Christmas, cookies, the Nutcracker, midnight mass, but one thing I truly hate. Buying gifts. Unfortunately, it seems like this is what dominates the season because the list of who to buy for gets longer and longer and the number of clients who NEED to settle their cases gets greater and greater and you end up with a wife who does nothing but shop and husband who does nothing but work to pay for the things that she bought. So in the end all Chad and I want for Christmas is one whole day together. Thankfully my mom gives that to us every year, so about three days after Christmas is when I get really merry.

Photo Dump

These were all sitting in my camera, just waiting to be blogged. Olivia (Jim in the back) and me at Olivia's first movie theatre movie. Olivia hamming it up in our first snow. And Olivia making some very important calls to whomever in the Detroit airport.

The Chadderbox

So Chad's surgery was quick and painless, literally, the man has a ridiculously high pain tolerance. The best part was the fact that typically reserved-with-strangers Chad was a total chatty cathy coming off the anesthesia Talking to nurses, residents, me as if he had known them forever. Hilarious. Now he's home and other than some side effects from the breathing tube he is doing fine. So today we are home enjoying our one day together before Olivia and I take off for Florida. And since we celebrated Thanksgiving three weeks ago I am having no guilt about bringing, out Christmas decorations, music and maybe even a little Charlie Brown Christmas, especially since we got our first snow last night.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Bragging rights

I rarely assert my bragging rights as a mother because I think that just invites things like temper tantrums in the middle of restaurants, but today I have to brag a little. Olivia is currently obsessed with being able to write her own name, I have no idea where this comes from because I have not really been emphsizing writing. Anyway, she made a perfect v today, which is not what I am bragging about.

After she made the perfect v (which she made at the writing station the librarian set up for her at our library, oh yeah, we are there that much) she had to show the librarian, of course, then she wanted to call Daddy, naturally. What did she want to do next? Put the scrap of paper in an envelope and mail it to her Papa! She was so hot and cold to Jim while he was here I was curious to see how she would react to him going back home. She was REALLY proud of that V, Papa, so I hope you understand that you are being mailed Olivia's eqivilant to the Magna Carta.

My kid is a good egg who loves her family. Brag concluded.

Night Owls

Why am I posting to my blog after midnight? For once it is not my persistant insomnia (thanks for that Annie). Chad is having surgery tomorrow so he has to do the whole no eating after midnight thing so we decided to have a little mid-week party and stay up late and eat and catch up on all our TiVoed stuff, do a few little house projects. However, once you reach a certain age the only food you can think of eating at midnight without horrible heartburn is a low fat organic yogurt (size 12 you are as good as mine). Olivia even got into the act and stayed up late; a side effect of mom guilt because she has a crazy childcare rigamarole tomorrow.

SO, depending on how this all goes I might not be on for a few days, but I know that you are all thinking of Chad and thanks to everyone for their well wishes and support. And in case you are wondering, at our house for real Thanksgiving? Steak Adobo Chili with avacado and black beans.

Al and Elizabeth Have A Sit Down

Al, I know that you have raised an awareness about Global Warming and that is very important, but I need to speak to you about something. Well, there is no good way to put this. Al, I want the globe to warm just a little bit more. The fact of the matter is I want to lose another three pounds before Christmas and the cold weather is really putting a damper on things. I understand people in Bangladesh are suffering, but so is that size 12 dress if I don't fit into it by New Year's and the suffering of our nation's apparel is a plight that is vastly overlooked.

Now don't get testy, I know I live in a cold weather place. But isn't that just semantics? I mean really with a hole in the ozone that big does anywhere really need to be cold anymore? I think that a little CO2 emission situation could really relieve the housing bubbles on the coasts. Everywhere could be as warm as California or Miami. And I reiterate, I don't like to run in the cold, or the cold dark. Why hasn't Global Warming dealt with daylight saving time yet? It is dark when I get up and dark before I eat dinner, now there is a crisis.

Oh please, now you are just getting high and mighty. You shared that medal with the UN and it didn't even boost your polling numbers. I mean really, come on. Like YOU are carbon neutral? Look at you. A small village in Southeast Asia starved so you there was enough food to feed you today. AL! AL! I'm sorry okay? I know you are sensitive about the weight gain. Al! Don't be like this. No, we talked about this, that is a terrible idea. Well he can think that all he wants but Barak doesn't always have your best interests at heart does he?

Tipper! Tipper! Al has locked himself in the bathroom again, he is threatening to grow out the beard. Bring me Boca Nuggets, that's what got him out last time.

Welcome Back Friday

For the last six months or so I have been taking my neighbor's infant son on Fridays. We loved having him and I think it was a valuble experience for Olivia to still be an only but to have the reality check that she is not the only person in the universe one day a week. I didn't really realize how much I had missed my Fridays. I thought that with Olivia in school three days I would have tons of free time and it wouldn't matter that I had one day where I got nothing done.

What I got done today was one really great day with my kid. A stress-free playdate, a girls lunch and we are looking forward to an afternoon of piling into bed with hot cocoa and books and maybe some holiday shopping. Fridays were a really important reality check for both of us, my one and only is just fine with me.

I think I am going to hang on to the no cooking Fridays thing though.

How you know that you are addicted to food

Chad actually kept down a meal today so to celebrate Chad made himself a loaf of bread, from scratch. I guess when you haven't eaten anything for four days you want your plain white bread, which is the only thing you can eat on day two of the bland diet, the way you want it.

Ps-Still not sick, but now I am tempting fate so I am going to stop.

Update

Well, Olivia has strep throat and Chad has the stomach flu and I have . . . nothing! An on and off runny nose and some fatigue which is probably from the amount of laundry I have been doing. Since my top 10 list of what I bring to fly was so popular I decided to do a top ten list of how I keep myself healthy in the midst of a highly contagious family.

1) Be really determined not to get sick-Last year was Olivia's first year in school and we were sick all winter, literally. It got to the point where if someone so much as sneezed I would burst into tears because it would mean weeks before whatever virus would cycle through all three of us. So far this Fall Olivia has had a double ear infection and strep. I had a bizarre 24 hour thing and that's it. You have to commit to the regimen because that is what works, last year I thought it was too much to do the regimen. I was wrong, being sick was way worse.

2) Be well stocked-I was caught a little off guard this year because it was still so warm it seemed too early for everyone to start getting sick. In my arsenal: Lysol wipes, floor disinfectant, unscented laundry soap and dryer sheets, paper towels, videos and new books (I actually have a box in the basement that I only pull out for sick days) and chicken stock. You can vary the drinks by illness, but I consider apple juice the go to because it is good for stomach stuff and colds.

3) Rubber gloves-My friends and family laugh that this is extreme, but when you are cleaning up vomit, dirty tissues, germ-covered glasses and all manner of infected items you better be wearing gloves. You can't wash your hands well enough to be germ free, people! That being said. . .

4) Wash hands-Not yours, you are wearing gloves, wash your kid and your husband's hands, constantly. If they are drinking or eating in bed, periodically have them get up and wash. If their hand is near their face they are putting germs all over your linens and remote control.

5) Clean your remote control-and everything else. I actually put myself in my husband's shoes today and wiped down everything he touched from his alarm clock to his razor to the fridge handle. I do this twice a day. Viruses are live things that mutate throughout the day, what he was infected with this morning will have changed into something else by the time he comes home. Everything down to sheets and pillows gets it. Quarantine them. I try to keep them in one room as much as possible. It makes it easier on me.

6) Airborne- I actually have no idea what is in this stuff or why it is so expensive, but it works. I was turned onto it by my friend Brittany who is a medical resident and swears by it. I gave it to the preschool teachers for Christmas last year and they were ecstatic. It may not prevent you from getting, whatever, but it definitely lessens the severity by quite a substantial amount. Heat it into a tea, it is much more tolerable.

7) Be a great big bitch, with a lot of empathy-It sucks to be sick and at this point in my life there are very few garden variety illnesses that I haven't had several times. Bland diets suck, sore throats suck, but that doesn't mean you get to sneak toast when you are on a liquid diet. Willpower must be provided to people who haven't eaten for days and no longer have any of their own, by force if necessary.

8) Be the first appointment with your doctor-If that means you call back twice and pretend like you were disconnected the first time because the first time around you didn't get the nurse who you know will hook you up, then that's what you do. You are also the first appointment so that your doctor still feels like she can spend time chatting with you. Also, make sure you doctor and the PA are part of the lesbian posse.

Be prepared at your appointment. I expect that my doctor know Olivia's medical history, she expects that I know exactly what she ate, when, her temps for the last 48 hours, her sleep patterns, everything. If you have a lot going on, write it down along with all medications your kid is on. It is your responsibility to give your doctor a complete picture so she can make an accurate diagnosis. That way when things go wrong and you need to make a nasty phone call you know your bases are covered.

9) Dress your kid cute-You would not believe what you can score with a sick kid in pink polka dotted tights. I know I don't have an appointment, but can I get swabbed for strep too?

10) Give it up a little- I spend a lot of time when Olivia is sick trying to make sure that she doesn't spend the whole day in front of the tv, which is a noble thing. However, as my husband pointed out to me, what do I want to do when I am sick? Whatever I damn well please, I am sick! All concessions should be made to please me and only me because I am afflicted with whatever HORRIBLE illness. So when she wants to read, and she eventually will, or color, or whatever, drop everything and do it with her. Until then, turn on the damn video.

The Golden Rule should apply at its upmost when your family is ill. Remember, they are going to get sick, you are eventually going to get something off the grocery cart. You can only hope that they remember how good you were and reciprocate.

In the trenches

So we got Jim on the plane on Saturday and Chad and Olivia promptly became very ill. So all the catching up I was hoping to do this week before Chad's outpatient surgery next week is out the window because I am busy playing Florence Nightingale to my mildly uncooperative patients. I believe the Florence Nightingale reference is apt because it looks like some act of warfare has taken place in my home. I have some very funny posts regarding Al Gore and women on their cell phones in the mall in the can, but they will have to wait.

Remember everyone, wash your hands!

Jim's best shots

Here are Jim's best shots from the trip so far. I think the light from the ballet photo is one of those great happy accidents.

Photographing faith

All right, I will admit to being a sucker for the photo challenges so here are my faith photos. I took these all in New Orleans quite a few years ago and whenever I think of the nitty gritty aspects of faith I think of these photos and New Orleans. When I was a senior in high school I was assigned a partner and we were to choose any book on the AP reading list and make a presentation to class on the book involving a visual aide. I was super lucky and got the best artist in class. Naturally, we chose Dante's Inferno and decided to make "Seven Levels of Hell-The Board Game."

New Orleans always makes me think of the drawings she made for that game. Dark, decay sin and the desire to reach redemption. No other city I have ever been to embraces man's original sin status like New Orleans. They don't revel in it (except during Mardi Gras, I imagine) like they do in Vegas, it is just a fact of life. They whole city is falling apart, the state of your soul should be no different. Yet, New Orleans is the only place I have ever spontaneously attended Mass. 6 AM in Jackson Square, I just felt like I needed to be there. I knew that I had a long way to go to redemption but I took that picture and I thought if I was going to find it anywhere it would be there.

Al Fresco

So my Fancy Simple post today is actually a happy coincidence because I wanted to do a post about this last week, but no time. Last Thursday was the Catholic holiday, All Saints Day. I love All Saints Day because it is like the anti-Halloween and I am such a ying-yang person that I love to have it come full circle like that. However, the other reason that I love All Saints Day is because it was on that date in 1512 that the Pope revealed the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel for the first time. So the answer to what inspires my faith the most? The Sistine Chapel.

I know that this is a totally sterotypical Catholic response, and a totally generic Art History response, but I don't care and I'll tell you why. I saw the chapel for the first time right after my thirteenth birthday. My uncle and his family were living in Milan at the time and my aunt took us to Rome to visit her mother and to sightsee. My other cousins who had been to Rome many times were bored as bored could be and bless them trooped through it all just for me. While I cannot claim that this day made me an Art History major since I did not even know there was such a thing, it did make me understand how art could inspire faith. This is the first thing you see when you walk in the door, the Pieta.

Then you wander through some of the most famous mosaics and sculpture in the world and you come across this.

Now I can say that probably many things on this trip were probably wasted on me, terrific food, a beautiful language, but I can honestly say that I remember every single thing that I saw from the moment that i entered St. Peter's Square. It probably was also the time in my life when I discovered that I have a photographic memory. The Vatican is an amazing and terrible place. It is all the piety and wonder of my faith and also the terrible excess. Today i would be hard pressed to look at the Sistine Chapel and not think about the fact that Michelangelo was forced to complete the chapel against his will by a war mongering Pope under conditions that would easily amount to torture in our modern age. Yet, you look at the Pieta or the Chapel and God becomes real. Humankind's desire to have a miraculous faith, the greatest story ever told, comes alive. The Bible became a real, breathing document of shame and redemption. Catholicism became more than church on Sunday, it became a culture, a complete civilization of people, a rich history that changed the world for good and bad.

I still wonder if my fondness for my faith doesn't stem more from my love of history, than from my love of God. Either way, for Olivia's thirteenth we will be going to Rome.

Going to Beautiful Lengths

My uncle sent this to me this week. It is a campaign that he works on and feel strongly about so please go to the site and if you are thinking about a change, now is the time, this is the opportunity. Have fabulous short hair for your holiday photos!

Turkey Day

The big day went without a hitch except for our poor kidsitter coming down with the flu (feel better Tina!!). The neighbors came through though and Olivia happily went with the new arrangement. We were really proud of our friend Chip who came spouseless into a strange crowd. Having two kitchens was a little stressful for a control freak since I couldn't be in two places at once, but being in Sarah and Heather's kitchen was much more comfortable than I expected and we felt very welcome in their home.

All in all it was a pretty low-key with most people taking off by ten, but we were so exhausted that we didn't care. So from left to right you have Jim carving the turkey, usually an honor bestowed on the most esteemed special guest, which Jim thought was a pretty raw deal espcially since we lost the carving knife somewhere between the two kitchens. Next is the kid pile up on Jocelyn, then everyone loving Lane, the newest baby, and finally me being a charming and witty hostess.

As always I missed a ton of great shots being busy with other things, but at least you can get an idea of what goes on at the other family Thanksgiving. And yes, we invited people other than the lesbian posse, though these photos don't show it.

Prep work

So here are some shots of the ridiculous prep work that goes into the week. The first shot is pretty indicitive of how the week went. Usually the last thing we do at night is brew some decaf and go over the schedule for the following day. Needless to say, those glasses contained something other than decaf because I roasted those tomatoes three times before they came out the way I like them.

Shot two is us getting loopy, this may have been the same night we found Sean the love of his life.

Shot three is the master schedule, and pasta frolla. I surely hope you can blow this shot up because all then me in all my OCD, Type A glory will be revealed for all the world to see. I have already decided that next year will be color coded.

The last shot is Chad ricing sweet potatoes, why is he so happy? Because he only had to rice the last six while I did the previoust 18 until I told him that I was going on strike. Since I ribboned thirty carrots before the sweet potatoes my fingers were an unnatural orange for a few days.

Wicked

So here she is in all her evil glory. I will not be winning any Academy Awards for make-up anytime soon, but I think I deserve some kind of award for getting a three year-old who had some very definite ideas of how the make-up should look to sit still while I applied crappy three dollar Target make-up to her face. Also, please note green hair.

What is the last picture of olivia in a tiara you ask? Oh that would be where Olivia totally took advantage of her mother's love of the holiday to do a second round of trick or treating in a totally different costume. Yeah, she came up with already. I know, I'm screwed.

Kicking off the recap

I love this picture because it shows everthing there is to know about Ellie and Olivia all in one shot. It is also the picture best captures early last week. I am pretty sure that Olivia wore nothing but skull and crossbones tights for three days.

Walden Pond

Since I missed last week's Fancy Simple challenges, which totally sucks because I would have won, I have to make up for it this week. Normally, I would not be on the bandwagon for a faith challenge because I think a lot of people my age have become as desensitized to religion as they have to violence thanks to the era of the values voter. However, I feel once you take religion out of the picture, faith is an incredible and wonderful thing that leaves me in awe daily.

Unfortunately, I was raised very Catholic so leaving organized religion out of the picture is pretty difficult. I have so many deep disagreements with the way that the officiants in my church have chosen to interpret faith and what it takes to be a good Christian and who you can love and who you can't that Chad and I have not been able to be as close with our practiced faith as we would like. Yet, I still wake up every day believing in God, believing that our purpose on Earth is to love others and do good things to earn the good things that happen to us so I can never bring myself to say that God and religion is irrelevant in our lives today.

So here is my quote, "All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen. Ralph Waldo Emerson

I think Emerson generally had it right. What I have seen others do has not been enough to make me not believe.

Last week catch up

I have a ton of pictures from last week to sift through so last week's post will have to go up later tonight. Thanks for sticking with me!

I think I hear the Rocky theme. . .

So this is it, the last big day of the year for us. Yeah, we have Christmas and New Year's left, but I don't cook for four straight days for those holidays. My spreadsheet gives me exactly 10 minutes to sit here and do nothing os i thought I'd take the opportunity to update everyone that so far we have had none of the major mishaps. We have had to retool a few dishes after the trial runs last week, but the main componants are all still there.

So I want to thank in advance Jim and Sarah and Heather for all their help this week, we definitely couldn't have put in the extra time without them. Tomorrow I will have all the photos and blog posts from the week as well as some of the Fancy Simple stuff. I think I will be posting too late for a prize, unfortunately, but I'll get it one of these days.

Okay, cue The Killers, my iPod download this week, 6:45 says: Preheat oven for breakfast casserole, Run. Oh yes, I am not missing my run today even though I will be doing it in the pitch dark in. . .check temp, oh wonderful, 36 degrees.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

I love you Daimon!

I will call soon, I promise.